Learning to Let Go of Human Validation

How important are social relationships?

For me, they are extremely important. After all, humans are social beings. We naturally seek connection, understanding, and affection from others. But as I grow older, I realize that every person experiences relationships differently.

Some people are naturally careless. Some are overly sensitive. Some simply do not care about what others think, while others spend nights overthinking every little interaction.

Finding Balance

After going through different phases of life, I finally realized something: we need balance.

We cannot think too much about everything, but we also cannot become completely numb. We should not be overly emotional, but we should not become too cold either.

Balance is difficult. Is it exhausting? Absolutely.

But the truth is, we are not obligated to become emotionally perfect human beings. Life does not work that way. Maybe the best thing we can do is simply live sincerely, be ourselves, and avoid hurting other people.

A Deeper Purpose

There is a quote that I deeply love:

"The purpose of our life in this world is to worship Allah. We live only to die.
 If you are not ready to die, then do not live."

Yet even though I love those words, I still struggle to fully live by them.

Why?

Because I am still human.

My Struggles

I still depend too much on people. I still crave validation from others. And honestly, my biggest weakness is women.

Whenever a woman gives me special treatment, I immediately become emotionally attached. Whenever someone gives me even a little attention, I start overthinking everything.

Sometimes I ask myself:

"Am I really that desperate for affection?"

And eventually, I had to admit the answer: Yes.

I truly want to feel loved. I truly want to feel important to someone. I want to feel chosen.

Maybe part of the reason is because deep inside, I often feel like nobody genuinely likes me. Maybe my standards are too high. Maybe I spend too much time chasing people who were never meant for me.

That is why I kept improving myself — not entirely for my own growth, but sometimes just to attract the attention of the women I admired.

The Realization

But over time, I realized something important: that mindset was wrong.

• • I cannot build my life on human validation
• • I cannot depend on temporary attention to feel valuable
• • I need to stand firmly in my own shoes
• • I need to learn how to survive loneliness without losing myself

I Was Never Truly Alone

And the funny thing is... I was never truly alone.

I have Allah. Allah has always been there for me. Allah has always been waiting for me to return. And maybe that is what I truly need the most.

Not more validation. Not more attention. Not more affection from people.

But a sincere return to Allah.